16 Novembro 2006
"Bad Times"
Primeiro o aviso*:
"If you receive an e-mail with a subject of
"Bad Times", delete it immediately WITHOUT READING IT. This is the most
DANGEROUS e-mail virus yet.
It will rewrite your hard drive. Not
only that, but it will scramble any disks that are even close to your
computer. It will recalibrate your refrigerator's coolness setting so
all your ice cream melts. It will demagnetize the strips on all your
credit cards, screw up the tracking on your VCR, and use subspace field
harmonics to render any CDs you try to play unreadable.
It will
give your ex-boy/girlfriend/ex-husband/wife your new phone number. It
will mix antifreeze into your fishtank. It will drink all your beer and
leave its socks out on the coffee table when there's company coming
over. It will put a dead kitten in the back pocket of your good suit and
hide your car keys when you are late for work.
Badtimes will make
you fall in love with a penguin. It will give you nightmares about
circus midgets. It will pour sugar in your gas tank and shave off both
your eyebrows while dating your current boy/girlfriend behind your back
and billing the dinner and hotel room to your Visa card.
It will
seduce your grandmother. It does not matter if she is dead, such is the
power of "Badtimes;" it reaches out beyond the grave to sully those
things we hold most dear.
It moves your car randomly around
parking lots so you can't find it. It will kick your dog. It will leave
libidinous messages on your boss's voicemail in your voice. It is
insidious and subtle. It is dangerous and terrifying to behold. It is
also a rather interesting shade of mauve.
Badtimes will give you
Dutch Elm disease. It will leave the toilet seat up. It will make a
batch of methamphetamine in your bathtub and leave bacon cooking on the
stove while it goes out to chase high school kids with your new
snowblower.
These are just a few of the signs. Be very, very
careful!"
E agora, a música: Laika
- Badtimes
* Recebido via mail faz tempo. Deve ser o único
falso alerta de vírus que teve direito a uma versão musical...:-)